Peanut Butter and Jelly

Way back in art school I was given an assignment to document how to perform a task. I illustrated how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

I distinctly remember my discomfort once I presented my work. I thought I’d captured all the steps perfectly and there’d be nothing to discuss. Then the professor asked: What order is better, should you first spread or the peanut butter or the jelly?

A lively conversation ensued, and I grimaced. Did I get this wrong? This feels really useless, who cares? Why explore something SO inconsequential?
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When I woke up this morning and made my daughter a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for her lunchbox, I realized something that’s been missing from that story for 20 years… there IS NO RIGHT ANSWER. Other than the obvious non-negotiables, like the sun rising in the morning, or needing oxygen to breather, life is pretty much about autonomy. Sure, you need to show up to work— there’s an expectation you’re there because you have an agreement with your employer— but you CHOOSE to show up and respect that commitment. It’s not written in stone that you’ll fulfill your obligations. it’s a choice.

The stress I felt during our class discussion was totally unwarranted. I arbitrarily decided the topic should not be discussed, and I was totally wrong. Seriously, what is the harm in talking about how to make a pb&j?

So often what feels like a problem, especially a roadblock in your head, is merely a stop sign that pops up when you’re feeing unsure. How about feeling frustration triggers a different thought— it’s time to stop, take a moment to pause and reflect. Wouldn’t that be so much more productive?

I overlooked the opportunity to have a conversation. To explore possibilities. I saw this as a box to check, rather than an invitation to explore.

Runners don’t touch the finish line gingerly with their big toe when they arrive; they push hard and sprint through past the end of the race. Give permission to yourself to use energy, have discussions, explore possibilities. Yes, sometimes done IS done, but don’t leave stones unturned.

If you want to rehash myriad ways one could look at how to make a pb&j sandwich… or discuss how to creatively look at your own life’s work, email me and let’s talk.